We are going to try a new experiment. Since Wednesdays kind of suck, what with no football and all, we are going to try a mailbag type thing. This is, of course, against our better judgement.

So feel free to send us questions, comments, complaints, philosophical musings, etc. You can submit them here. Points for being funny.

Avid reader/former commenter/CMU Football analyst A. Young writes:

"I recently broke my leg, and people have been helping me out a lot at work and such. (1) How do you repay people for doing things for you, and (2) how long can you milk the injury?"

(1) There is only one way to repay anyone for doing anything for you: buy them alcohol.

You can't just give them straight up cash, that would be shady. So the next best thing is to allow them to get drunk on your dime. Whether it's picking up the tab at the bar, providing the case of beer for Sunday/Monday/Wednesday night, or finding that elusive bottle of Vladamir vodka, people will know just how much you appreciate them.

Sure, you spend $20 while your buddy gives up all of his Saturday to move your sleeper sofa. But do you think he'd do it for a $20 bill? Hell no. He'd tell you to go round up some hobos and keep a close watch on your stuff. But by allowing him to bypass the actual spending of money and the drive to get the beer, you give off a bigger sense of gratitude. This is mainly due to the fact that if beer cost $100 a case, we'd still by it.

(2) This really depends on the gender of the person, as well as the relationship. Let's take a look:

• Jackass male friends: If you don't have crutches, don't expect anything. Oh you have a neat little boot? Guess that means you can walk. Grab me a beer, Pegleg.

• Non-jackass male friends: N/A

• Cute female friends: You probably have one favor to use for each. They are probably busy having slumber parties and pillow fights with other cute female friends, so bringing you Taco Bell three times a week will become annoying.

• Non-cute female friends: They'll probably bring you Taco Bell once a day, even after the cast comes off.

• Male coworkers: You've got about a week, but the same rules apply as with your guy friends. Without crutches, you're just a dude that comes to work with one shoe on.

• Female coworkers: This isn't about how long you can milk the injury. This is about opportunity. You can FINALLY strike up a conversation with that cute girl from Accounting. And on top of that, you can get her to do things for you. It's win-freaking-win!

• Parents: See Jackass male friends.

Well, I hope that helps. We're all about making people's lives better here at the NEZ.

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